How many times have we fallen into the iron clutches of fear, watching longingly as time, opportunities, and dreams slip away from us like sand in an hourglass? How many times have we muttered to ourselves, “I could do that just as good as them” or “they’re no more special than I am,” only to have wasted yet another night glued to a screen, scrolling, scrolling, scrolling...
So often we think that we’ve got to have it all figured out before we take action. And that when we do take action, it has to be our best work. Perfect, crisp, organized, professional, and if we present this perfect thing to the world, we’ll avoid all criticism, failure, discomfort, and disaster...Well I hate to break it to you, but that is why you’re sitting on your couch for the third hour straight watching someone else live their dreams instead of you being out there living yours.
As a fellow human striving to let go of perfectionism, that’s the reality, and it stings. We know we’re meant for more and we also know that we’re the only thing holding us back. We are ALWAYS our own biggest enemy. And we are 9 times out of 10, our own biggest roadblock when, in reality, we need to be our own biggest advocate, cheerleader, and hype woman!
Because here’s the deal--you will never have it all figured out. You will never avoid 100% of the criticism or nay-sayers. No matter the level you reach, there will still be times when you just have to give it your best guess, trouble shoot, get it wrong, mess up, ask for help, re-start, tweak, adjust, adapt...
So what is it that successful people (however you define success) get right about confidence? The secret is that is that they’ve realized to let go of the all-or-nothing mentality. That type of black and white thinking, the ‘everything must be perfect or it’s a no-go’ thought process will keep you stuck and stagnant. The ONLY time you need to be perfect is if you’re building a rocket for NASA (of which none of you are, so cool the jets). Messy action is where all the power lies!
Because babe, confidence isn’t the absence of doubts, it’s the decision to move forward with them. To take daring steps despite them!Confidence isn’t the absence of fear, it’s about deciding to act anyway.
Confidence and doubt are not enemies. Think of it this way: doubt is just a sign that you care. It can be a powerful compass because it can guide you to what means the most to your soul. Every time you have a negative emotion, choose to see it as a guide. Because that is exactly what it is--a wise sage from the deepest, most powerful parts of your soul.
When you can release the pressure to have it all figured out, you realize that fear and confidence can absolutely co-exist. The vast majority of the incredibly confident people I know are not fearless in the sense that they never have a single fear. What I mean is that they are fearless because they take their fear and doubt and insecurity by the hand, and jump anyway.
True confidence isn’t about never being afraid or never feeling insecure. It isn’t about never second guessing or having doubts pop up as you make choices and move forward. True, deep, lasting confidence is about choosing to hold all parts of yourself with love. Choosing to trust yourself to the core and knowing that you will have your own back no matter what. It is taking time to sit with your emotions (and I mean all of your emotions), and then listening to them, seeing them, and learning from what they have to say. Validating the deep wisdom they hold and knowing when it’s time to put fear and doubt back in the passenger seat. Because my dear, YOU are the driver. This is YOUR life.
So how can you start building your confidence one step at a time? First, remember that building your inner safety net comes with practice, exposure, and self-compassion. Be like a little child learning to walk. You don’t see them hesitantly putting their foot out...tapping around to see if there’s still floor in front of them. No! They’re taking huge, wobbly, bold steps and trusting that either their other leg will catch up, an adult will catch them, or that if they fall, they will just get back up again. So ask yourself: “How can I show up fully today, even if I feel uncertain? What if doubt isn’t proof I’m unworthy, but evidence I’m alive and feeling? That I’m aware, and willing to stretch? What is my next smallest step?” And then go from there.
How many times have we fallen into the iron clutches of fear, watching longingly as time, opportunities, and dreams slip away from us like sand in an hourglass? How many times have we muttered to ourselves, “I could do that just as good as them” or “they’re no more special than I am,” only to have wasted yet another night glued to a screen, scrolling, scrolling, scrolling...
So often we think that we’ve got to have it all figured out before we take action. And that when we do take action, it has to be our best work. Perfect, crisp, organized, professional, and if we present this perfect thing to the world, we’ll avoid all criticism, failure, discomfort, and disaster...Well I hate to break it to you, but that is why you’re sitting on your couch for the third hour straight watching someone else live their dreams instead of you being out there living yours.
As a fellow human striving to let go of perfectionism, that’s the reality, and it stings. We know we’re meant for more and we also know that we’re the only thing holding us back. We are ALWAYS our own biggest enemy. And we are 9 times out of 10, our own biggest roadblock when, in reality, we need to be our own biggest advocate, cheerleader, and hype woman!
Because here’s the deal--you will never have it all figured out. You will never avoid 100% of the criticism or nay-sayers. No matter the level you reach, there will still be times when you just have to give it your best guess, trouble shoot, get it wrong, mess up, ask for help, re-start, tweak, adjust, adapt...
So what is it that successful people (however you define success) get right about confidence? The secret is that is that they’ve realized to let go of the all-or-nothing mentality. That type of black and white thinking, the ‘everything must be perfect or it’s a no-go’ thought process will keep you stuck and stagnant. The ONLY time you need to be perfect is if you’re building a rocket for NASA (of which none of you are, so cool the jets). Messy action is where all the power lies!
Because babe, confidence isn’t the absence of doubts, it’s the decision to move forward with them. To take daring steps despite them!Confidence isn’t the absence of fear, it’s about deciding to act anyway.
Confidence and doubt are not enemies. Think of it this way: doubt is just a sign that you care. It can be a powerful compass because it can guide you to what means the most to your soul. Every time you have a negative emotion, choose to see it as a guide. Because that is exactly what it is--a wise sage from the deepest, most powerful parts of your soul.
When you can release the pressure to have it all figured out, you realize that fear and confidence can absolutely co-exist. The vast majority of the incredibly confident people I know are not fearless in the sense that they never have a single fear. What I mean is that they are fearless because they take their fear and doubt and insecurity by the hand, and jump anyway.
True confidence isn’t about never being afraid or never feeling insecure. It isn’t about never second guessing or having doubts pop up as you make choices and move forward. True, deep, lasting confidence is about choosing to hold all parts of yourself with love. Choosing to trust yourself to the core and knowing that you will have your own back no matter what. It is taking time to sit with your emotions (and I mean all of your emotions), and then listening to them, seeing them, and learning from what they have to say. Validating the deep wisdom they hold and knowing when it’s time to put fear and doubt back in the passenger seat. Because my dear, YOU are the driver. This is YOUR life.
So how can you start building your confidence one step at a time? First, remember that building your inner safety net comes with practice, exposure, and self-compassion. Be like a little child learning to walk. You don’t see them hesitantly putting their foot out...tapping around to see if there’s still floor in front of them. No! They’re taking huge, wobbly, bold steps and trusting that either their other leg will catch up, an adult will catch them, or that if they fall, they will just get back up again. So ask yourself: “How can I show up fully today, even if I feel uncertain? What if doubt isn’t proof I’m unworthy, but evidence I’m alive and feeling? That I’m aware, and willing to stretch? What is my next smallest step?” And then go from there.
How many times have we fallen into the iron clutches of fear, watching longingly as time, opportunities, and dreams slip away from us like sand in an hourglass? How many times have we muttered to ourselves, “I could do that just as good as them” or “they’re no more special than I am,” only to have wasted yet another night glued to a screen, scrolling, scrolling, scrolling...
So often we think that we’ve got to have it all figured out before we take action. And that when we do take action, it has to be our best work. Perfect, crisp, organized, professional, and if we present this perfect thing to the world, we’ll avoid all criticism, failure, discomfort, and disaster...Well I hate to break it to you, but that is why you’re sitting on your couch for the third hour straight watching someone else live their dreams instead of you being out there living yours.
As a fellow human striving to let go of perfectionism, that’s the reality, and it stings. We know we’re meant for more and we also know that we’re the only thing holding us back. We are ALWAYS our own biggest enemy. And we are 9 times out of 10, our own biggest roadblock when, in reality, we need to be our own biggest advocate, cheerleader, and hype woman!
Because here’s the deal--you will never have it all figured out. You will never avoid 100% of the criticism or nay-sayers. No matter the level you reach, there will still be times when you just have to give it your best guess, trouble shoot, get it wrong, mess up, ask for help, re-start, tweak, adjust, adapt...
So what is it that successful people (however you define success) get right about confidence? The secret is that is that they’ve realized to let go of the all-or-nothing mentality. That type of black and white thinking, the ‘everything must be perfect or it’s a no-go’ thought process will keep you stuck and stagnant. The ONLY time you need to be perfect is if you’re building a rocket for NASA (of which none of you are, so cool the jets). Messy action is where all the power lies!
Because babe, confidence isn’t the absence of doubts, it’s the decision to move forward with them. To take daring steps despite them!Confidence isn’t the absence of fear, it’s about deciding to act anyway.
Confidence and doubt are not enemies. Think of it this way: doubt is just a sign that you care. It can be a powerful compass because it can guide you to what means the most to your soul. Every time you have a negative emotion, choose to see it as a guide. Because that is exactly what it is--a wise sage from the deepest, most powerful parts of your soul.
When you can release the pressure to have it all figured out, you realize that fear and confidence can absolutely co-exist. The vast majority of the incredibly confident people I know are not fearless in the sense that they never have a single fear. What I mean is that they are fearless because they take their fear and doubt and insecurity by the hand, and jump anyway.
True confidence isn’t about never being afraid or never feeling insecure. It isn’t about never second guessing or having doubts pop up as you make choices and move forward. True, deep, lasting confidence is about choosing to hold all parts of yourself with love. Choosing to trust yourself to the core and knowing that you will have your own back no matter what. It is taking time to sit with your emotions (and I mean all of your emotions), and then listening to them, seeing them, and learning from what they have to say. Validating the deep wisdom they hold and knowing when it’s time to put fear and doubt back in the passenger seat. Because my dear, YOU are the driver. This is YOUR life.
So how can you start building your confidence one step at a time? First, remember that building your inner safety net comes with practice, exposure, and self-compassion. Be like a little child learning to walk. You don’t see them hesitantly putting their foot out...tapping around to see if there’s still floor in front of them. No! They’re taking huge, wobbly, bold steps and trusting that either their other leg will catch up, an adult will catch them, or that if they fall, they will just get back up again. So ask yourself: “How can I show up fully today, even if I feel uncertain? What if doubt isn’t proof I’m unworthy, but evidence I’m alive and feeling? That I’m aware, and willing to stretch? What is my next smallest step?” And then go from there.
